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Ronson has become the protector of porn stars. I share that fascination, having worked for adult magazines around , when the landscape was very different.

Invariably it would turn out, years later, that these feats had been greatly exaggerated, but nonetheless, they had tapped into an American obsession with athletic achievement and winning, ingrained at high school age.

Credit: Getty Images. As he told The Yorkshire Post , the pressure of telling the story responsibly led him to be diagnosed with adjustment disorder — basically situational depression — for which he sought cognitive behavioural therapy.

They realised that one way of combatting the piracy of porn was to create bespoke videos for individuals to their very precise specifications.

One example Ronson gives is a film in which Wonder Woman is trying to leave the house but is prevented from doing so by a gremlin.

Many of these custom videos can be traced back to childhood trauma, it seems. William R. Hearst disagreed so vehemently with the film's context, and West's portrayal of a Salvation Army worker, that he personally forbade any stories or advertisements of the film to be published in any of his newspapers.

However, the film did well at the box office and is considered the high-point of West's film career. Throughout the s her films were anticipated as major events, but by the end of the decade she seemed to have reached her limit and her popularity waned.

Edward Sutherland, — did not do well at the box office, and she found censorship was severely limiting her creativity.

West, looking for a vehicle to make a comeback in films, accepted the part, demanding creative control over the film.

Cline, Despite tension on the set between West and Fields she was a teetotaler and he drank , the film was a box-office success, out-grossing Fields' previous two films.

After making The Heat's On Gregory Ratoff, for Columbia, she planned to retire from the screen and went back to Broadway and on a tour of English theatres.

The play was produced by theater and film impresario Mike Todd and ran for performances and then went on tour.

In , when she was 62, she began a nightclub act in which she was surrounded by musclemen; it ran for three years and was a great success.

In , West formed a nightclub act which revived some of her earlier stage work, featuring her in song-and-dance numbers and surrounded by musclemen fawning over her for attention.

The show ran for three years and was a great success. With this victory, she felt it was a good time to retire.

She also recorded a few albums in different genres including rock 'n' roll and a Christmas album which, of course, was more parody and innuendo than a religious celebration.

In the s, she appeared in two more films. She starred in Sextette Ken Hughes, , which she based on her own stage play.

Both were box office flops, but are now seen as cult films. She was There was no doubt she was way ahead of her time with her sexual innuendos and how she made fun of a puritanical society.

She did a lot to bring it out of the closet and perhaps we should be grateful for that. And, please check out our blog European Film Star Postcards.

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It's important to appreciate that the Sodality Ladies are all Cuckoldresses, not hotwives. The hotwife is - to a degree - still under the control of her husband.

Her infidelities and sluttish behaviour are carried out under his direction - or at least with his broad approval. The husband of a hotwife is aroused by his wife's outrageous sexuality.

The husband of a hotwife may also be permitted to have extra-marital pursuits of his own. A cuckolding relationship is quite different.

The husband gets nothing, beyond vicariously experiencing his Wife's evolution into his Ultimate Slut Goddess. Additionally, many of the Aristocratic Cuckoldresses of the Sodality are also Mistresses and Dominatrices like me who physically discipline and punish their spouses, further emphasizing the Sodality's philosophy of Female Supremacy in all aspects of life.

In a cuckolding relationship, it is easy to see what's in it for the Wife: everything. She has complete power over Her husband, and enjoys absolute freedom to seek sexual pleasure whenever and wherever She desires.

But what does the husband gain from such a marriage? It's a little harder to say, but the devotion of a cuckold to his Cuckoldress is extraordinarily intense.

On an evening such as this one pictured above when I am out and about and engaged in professional escort work I had a date with Lord Racke , my hubby was back at home, vicariously living every moment with me.

On such a night his emotions will zigzag from anxiety to excitement, frustration, jealousy, lust, love, adoration, and an almost spiritual devotion to his Living Goddess.

And - as my hubby is prevented from expressing his strong feelings in any physical way - there is no closure for him: his conflicting emotions just build and build and build.

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Though the evil vamp Jobeth was leveling a gun at his heart, Alex, the seasoned section chief of the secret intelligence department, could not resist her wiles and charms any longer.

Recently my enthusiasm to make a documentary on my transvestism has returned. It is I suppose a vanity project and a highly self indulgent idea but with each passing month I really would like to express myself openly on camera about my own struggle with being a transvestite.

When I was a teenager I was trying to deal with this issue on my own and had a real fear of ever telling anyone I wanted to dress up as a girl and act is if I was female.

I suppressed my desire for over two decades before finally setting free my desire in my early forties. Since the start of the year I have been recovering from major surgery and had time to reflect and look back at my cross-dressing throughout my life.

I have been lacking in confidence about my efforts to create a female appearance but find as I get older a growing feeling of acceptance is forming within me.

For me my desire is not just dressing up, though I really do enjoy this aspect, I also have a deep desire to actually pass as a woman and I challenge myself mentally and physically to try and succeed with this aspiration.

I was looking back at my very early efforts from late in year to , this was the start period for me as I finally became a practicing transvestite and committed to shaving off my body hair and reshaping my eyebrows.

This was a huge step at the time and something I had dreamed of doing since the s! I was interested to see the look and clothing choices I made in this early cross-dressing period and especially fascinated by the poses I assumed for my pictures.

As a boy and an adult male I always liked the idea of female impersonation and wondered could I pass as a girl and cease to be perceived as a boy.

The concept intrigued and thrilled me and I wish I had acted upon it in my teenage years. I was too fearful and troubled by the prospect despite the excitement I felt at the notion of actually doing it so took the easy option of denial.

In my early pictures I definitely dressed and posed for pictures in a provocative manner which has rather taken me aback as these days I am motivated more to look realistic in my efforts to become a woman.

I am trying to be as honest as possible with myself in recent years as I still think I carried a lot of denial into my early cross-dressing.

This picture I post here intrigues me for several reasons. Secondly I wondered what on earth my motivation was for dressing like this and striking the pose.

I know my own sexuality and I am definitely not attracted to men yet when I cross-dress I want men to be attracted to my female image! So what is that all about?

In the spirit of attempting to follow my declaration I wish to be honest about my cross-dressing I think the reason I dressed and posed this ways all to do with sex.

I always found myself aroused in that early period of transvestism an will admit there was much self pleasuring going on.

I found the whole experience to be highly erotic yet on other more emotional levels it was truly incredible to attempt to swap gender. The truth is I can recall enjoying the clothes and posing away in such a manner at the time.

It may look a bit sad and be somewhat tragic to have been doing that but I did it so why deny it? I think there was an element of fascination with seeing myself attempting to be a woman and I think I was, mad as this may sound, a little bit in love with my female image.

It is like I was trying to follow a female fantasy and I wonder was it my male self that motivated this look and pose? I suspect it was.

I used to feel quite distraught after these experiences despite being on a real high when they were actually occurring.

The male side was still dominating back then so despite freeing my desire to dress as a woman and enjoying the my time in the guise of a female I still felt guilt and a bit disturbed by my indulgence afterwards.

Mercifully, that reaction after any cross-dressing has long gone. Returning to my documentary I would like to be open about every aspect of my experiences and maybe it could highlight that others share similar experiences.

It is those guilt feelings I used to experience that I feel lead to purges some of us carry out. Purging is ultimately a futile experience as I think if you are a transvestite then you are one for life, that desire is not going to go away.

It may fall away for periods but inevitably returns. So how do I feel about this picture? I regret getting hung up on it and the guilt I used to feel.

Cross-dressing is a gentle pastime really, it is all about self expression and enjoying oneself. It is our society that indoctrinates us to feel bad about it.

I suppose some men can feel diminished by their transvestism but for me I genuinely feel more empowered as an individual because I do on occasion attempt to pass myself off as a woman.

My greatest fear is insulting women by my actions. I am fully aware I have a desire to spend time as a woman, well as close as I can achieve as I am not female.

It does bring great emotional satisfaction and real euphoria, I adore it. Cross-dressing is not a bad desire really yet so many of us worry about it and fear discovery.

Even now after expressing that view I am terrified of anyone discovering I cross-dress as a woman yet I feel comfortable and at ease when I do engage in the activity.

I am expecting some mockery for posting this picture, but I wanted to acknowledge it is all part of the journey so one should not be too worried about looks and poses you may have done in the past.

The past is the past and the only way is forward. He realised that all he had done before was just finish. With Harland, he had something else.

He glanced down at his hands and then moved away from the couch. Then what? He turned first onto his side. He looked at Harland.

He had his sister here. Leaving her Once they were free of Graham's genetic material, he took a breath and dried them on a nearby towel. He stood in the doorway, completely naked, looking towards the couch where Graham still reclined.

He didn't allow time for Graham to reply, "It wouldn't be terribly difficult to get a position in the London symphony-orchestra.

Our general director has many contacts there. I'm sure he'd give me a solid recommendation. His expression hopeful.

He pulled himself up and drew his knees up as he leaned on the back of the couch, one elbow on the back of the couch. I have to admit, I'm not that good at thinking ahead.

Ask my brothers. I always live in the now And when we first met, I wasn't entirely sure we would last more than a week, to be honest.

I was convinced you would leave me for some gorgeous fluteplayer I'm happy to have her around So I could communicate a bit better with her.

Coming up for a bath darling? He didn't look like he was in his forties. At least, Harland didn't think so. She can speak French and German as well.

He'd known nearly his entire life and he still couldn't say it. Upon reaching the bathroom, he would start filling the tub then came back to the top of the stairs to sit on the top step completely naked.

He lit a cigarette. Once he was close enough, he reached out to take the cigarette from him. Harland took a drag and looked into Graham's eyes as he sucked the air through the filter and inhaled the pungent smoke.

As he handed it back, he exhaled, and then leaned forward to steal a small kiss. It was boyish, something he'd seemed to mostly shed of himself, but every once in a while, Graham had a way of making it come back; just like the blushing mess he was the night they first kissed.

He licked his lips, "I could teach you Polish. He couldn't help but grin when Harland mentioned that he had popped his cherry. It really was I really haven't Eton really Of course if she switches to German, I'm done for.

I'm not learning that gutteral trash He knew it was all in the past, but he couldn't help but feel a little jealousy.

He didn't know where it came from, or why he even cared, but he could acknowledge it was there. As he did so, he moved in between the doctor's legs as he continued to sit on the top stair with the bath water running in the back ground.

His lips pursed into a small grin and then he began to speak in a very low, soft voice, in German. The language had a reputation for being harsh and guttral, but when Harland spoke it, he did so like he was speaking with profound fondness which softened every sound he made.

Due to the inflection in his cadence, Graham could tell he was asking a question when he spoke. Harland moved his lips over the side of Graham's neck and then nibbled his earlobe slightly as he continued to smooth whispering of sweet nothings all in that "trash" language.

Somehow, he made it sound sexy. He couldn't hide his arousal sitting around in the nude like that. He loved the way Graham's lips tasted, especially when he could still make out the flavor of his own cock on them.

Harland looked into Graham's eyes as he teased and then he stepped past the smoking man to move into the bathroom and slip into the tub.

He took up the real estate at the reclining end of the tub, his arms outstretched over the edge like a king in his keep. It might have been amusing how he acted like he owned the place.

He leaned over to turn off the water and get in on the other end. Then he would ease a foot between Harland's legs, tickling his balls with his toes.

He leaned back in the tub. No one ever called him that aside from Graham and his sister. Sometimes his own name seemed like secret code.

He made no efforts to wash himself, instead, he merely watched Graham from his own end of the tub, barely flinching even as his balls were tickled. Harland's gaze never left Graham's body.

He looked up and tilted his head slightly at Harland. It would be 7 years before the song that verbalised his feelings would be released so he had to rely on his own poetry.

He opened his mouth and nothing came out. Oh blast it, just plagarise Shakespeare. Despite having cum only a short time ago, he could feel the attention beginning to awaken his desires again.

Harland shifted his hips slightly, and then let his tongue wetten his lips before he glanced up again. He kept his head slightly cast down and his eyes lifted so that he could watch Graham at the other end of the tub, but he never moved beyond a slight shifting here or there.

His hands remained on the round, smooth edge of the porcelain basin. He rarely did until he was asked. He stopped teasing Harland with his foot and shifted in the water.

He brought his hands together, twisting the ring on his finger thoughtfully. There was no real way for Harland to guess what he was thinking, but he did have his own theories.

He allowed Graham a moment of quiet to think about it. The only real sound coming from the water in the tub itself.

He let a nearly uncomfortable span of time pass before he spoke again, this time when he did it was quieter. And yet An rare show of anger and frustration.

Something Graham kept so deep inside his family, save for Luke was not aware. I was 23 when I married her.

She was only We had to. She got pregnant. It's one of those things you never think is going to happen after only once I did what I thought was the right thing to do.

But perhaps the right thing to do was to not get involved in the first place and just walk away. We didn't have much of a marriage. I was studying a lot, doing a lot of work at the hospital and 2 years later, we tried to strengthen our tattered relationship with another child.

It didn't work. I've wanted a divorce for years. Especially since the children are not longer children. And they hate me. Thanks to their mother She's catholic Only this separation Even if I wanted to with another woman, I couldn't marry her.

And in the case of you The disguise the reduces suspicion regarding our relationship Despite his age, Harland was typically rather reasonable and mild-mannered.

Often times, it was even difficult to discern whether or not he was upset at all. It didn't make him closed off, he simply chose not to express what he felt.

When he tried, it often sounded emotionless and dry. It sometimes sounded insincere. So when he spoke this time, he tried to remove the unemphatic quality to his words.

You're the only person I've ever wanted to be with. You're my first love and if our cards will have it, my only love. He was trying to stay like stone, completely composed.

Though, deep down Harland was a sensitive soul. He was a musician after all, emotion was not lost on him. When we go out, I can't hold your hand.

I have to watch women touch you. I have to smile and pretend like I don't care. But I do care. If you have to stay married to her, at least let me see you in a ring that means something.

Tears stung his eyes. I know My brother thinks I have a mental disorder. And most people around us will regard us as sexual deviants or communists if only they knew.

I don't know which is worse. I would shout my love for you from ever corner if I could. If such an act did not bring about the end of my ability to provide for us, and to be taken seriously in my profession.

He had done it all his life. I will wear your ring with pride The pianist kissed him, closing his eyes and drawing his lover in close to his body while wrapping arms around him.

His right hand moved to Graham's jaw, tilting his head up towards his mouth as he looked in a downward angle at him, his lips softly tasting Graham's in a sweet show of affection.

He paused, just long enough to say something with his mostly hidden accent. All alone, waiting for company. Waiting for someone imaginative, full of ideas, sexual spark, non vanilla to sit next to me, to join me in and allow adventure to go further.

Someone whose mind, whose words, whose thoughts, tempt me to show a little more. So what are you waiting for, you know where i am This morning I find myself in an introspective mood and as I so often do, thinking about my transvestism.

I think it is fair to say in my own case I find my transgender side moves in circles. By that I mean my thoughts and desires in regard to my cross-dressing as a woman can feel very certain and I believe in them yet they fade and move onto other certainties.

These can at times conflict with each other and add to my confusion. That paragraph itself may lead to confusion after reading it so let me try and explain what occurs.

My situation is I am transgender however, I live full time as a man as my birth certificate and my body state very clearly I am male. Despite knowing that and recognising that is how I feel most of the time I have an aspect that causes inner conflict yet has the potential to bring me such inner joy and emotional reward it causes me to doubt my male life.

That aspect is a strong desire to be female. This desire to be female is at odds with my male self but it exists very powerfully within me.

Seeing my flat chest, male genitalia and hairy body can cause me upset. The obvious conclusion if one were to believe that life is simply black and white is I want to be female so I must be a transsexual.

Am I transsexual? I believe I am but not completely. The grey exists, nothing is black and white, the feelings manifest themselves in too many and at times paradoxical ways.

I am aware a times I desire to be a woman one hundred percent, to be male is distressing. At times I also am very content to be male and so the paradox is exposed.

How can I want to be both woman and man? My narratives that accompany my Flickr photo posts are my outlet for self expression as I am a secret transvestite and I rarely get an opportunity to communicate with other transgender people so I open up in my stream of consciousness thoughts in my narratives.

Should anyone have read my previous photo narratives or listened to my video musings they will maybe notice I do contradict myself rather a lot.

I wanted to expose this as I think it surely must be a scenario others who cross-dress may encounter? I do call myself a transvestite as I am only dressing up as a woman, I am not transitioning full time.

I do at times want to but I have far more I enjoy in my current life to embark on such a journey. Also, certain things bring me down to earth.

There are other factors at play that influence my choices on my transsexual aspects. I do think one has to really be as realistic as possible in their decision making and endeavour to take a long term view and weigh things up.

I am fairly certain left to my own devices I would be consumed by my desire to be a female and embrace it. However, I know that is fantasy as I simply do not have what it takes to be that woman.

I lack the physicality to pass as a woman in the real world. Also includes extreme, no-holds barred close-ups of fish.

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